Calming the Chaos

The scene is and has been utter chaos since the second I woke up with my sweet husband bringing our near 100 lbs shepherd "puppy" to wake me. Stumble out of bed, gather enough eggs to feed a small army (aka my family of 4 with two growing boys), turn on the burner. I have been up just 1.5 hours and I have made breakfast, organized and arranged all of each kid's school fundraiser packets taking pictures of what was ordered and putting checks dutifully in each envelope which involved "covering" a few family members and coordinating with father of the spawn for his orders. I have done room checks to ensure my spawn are not living like the slobs they would be if I did not enforce said checks every few days (because we should all have a multitude of string cheese wrappers and sports paraphernalia in every crevice). 

I have re-stocked the toilet paper in each bathroom since apparently I am the only one who thinks of this even though I am only 1/4 of the butts in the household. I have begun the "special wash" laundry which is scrubs, church clothes, and chapel wear and requires just slightly more attention that the other loads of laundry that would make my mother's generation cringe (all colors and textures together all the time, because who has time to sort carefully?!). I have straightened each room of the house, because after a few days of me not doing this there is a pepper shaker by an Amazon return package, corn ears for getting kernels for seed from in the laundry room next to a drying bra, street hockey balls on the kitchen table next to photos for Matt's family tree...you get the drift. 


Side note: Why oh why do kids have SO much homework these days? It is a punishment to parents. I worked 10 hours yesterday and came home for the 3rd day in a row to help with 2+ hours of homework with overtired kids who had already had sports practice (not saying sports are more important...but can we tone it down???). Matthew is a perfectionist (God help him-no idea where that came from 😏), so his work is painstakingly done hour by hour. 

I have it good. In this chaos I am attempting to calm I at least have help. Matt unloaded the dishwasher and Isaiah did the recycling. Barrett made our bed and drove the kids to school. Bob (our robot vacuum and sometimes my favorite member of the family) is happily vacuuming the floors and was seriously the best investment ever and I may need a fleet of Bob's at some point. I retired to finish the coffee I had barely touched and to blog. Yes, there are still dishes in the sink I will tackle later, dusting that desperately needs done, plants to water and oh so many things on my get ready for open house in a little over a week list such as touching up paint (does it ever end?!) and cob-webbing the exterior. Again, though, I am reminded that I have it good. I get one weekday off a week to attend to all of these things and hopefully get a little time for me to write, to shave my legs, to interview with potential NP schools, to contemplate life. 

Sometimes I feel there is very little time for me. I know, I am a mom-I signed up for this, but we all need time. I need time to plan our vacations, and to paint my toenails. I need time to read. I need to overthink what in the world I should do with my life as I am always so undecided. I could write pages on that just to vent it all out. What is the BEST career for me? How do I be fulfilled AND get enough time at home? How do I do and have it all?

I am a big thinker. I need that time. I wilt without it.

How do other families manage I want to know? I do not feel as though I am an easily overwhelmed person. For the most part I tend to roll with what life gives me, but I also have AMAZING support and a plethora of blessings. I can definitely see how stay home moms have a full time job. All I ever think with my one day off during the week is that I need many more to manage things the way I would want. I keep looking at ways to cut back. My boys LOVE their activities even though we as parents are run ragged. 1 child in soccer and piano, the other in soccer, basketball, baseball and choir. I feel bad. I still say no. Isaiah would love to play ice hockey. He has the aptitude even, but the nearest leagues are Salem or Eugene. I had to say no. We just can't. He can play any sport locally and/or at his school that is offered and any instrument...but I can't. We can't work and get him there. We told Matt no to fall baseball and club soccer for the same reasons. I love that they want to, and I want to give them everything...but I can only be one place at once (kids and also my employer seem to have trouble with this basic physics concept). 

Life is great. We have so much to be thankful for. I guess when it is all said and done chaos is a by-product of a full and happy life. 



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