A Life and Mission I am Thankful For

 Happy Thanksgiving to you all! Today is a pretty low-key day for my family as the boys are in California with dad, and we are doing a non-traditional feast of pizza, salad and drinks this evening instead of turkey and fixings. It is my mama's bday today, and that is what she wanted. 

Life has been very full. In September I began a new job working as a family nurse practitioner in primary care. I plan to blog more to share an inside look at medicine. 

Obviously whenever I tell a story I have changed ALL identifying details of my patient, but have left enough in to get the meaning of the encounter for you. That should go without being said, but there: a disclaimer for you. 

It has been quite the journey, and I must say that most days I actually enjoy my job. Would I rather stay home curled up with a novel or be out on the lake or traveling? WELL DUH. 😎But I can't make a living doing that so there you go. I always sought finding a job I loved enough to want to go to work. I have been sharing with my friends and my sons my newfound thoughts on this. Find a job you can tolerate and that you like on some days, a job that makes you feel like you are contributing and have purpose. Even then, you'd probably rather stay home if your home is your sanctuary. You'd probably rather be out doing fun things. So work hard at something so you can play hard, and have balance and rest. More people probably don't say this because it isn't as catchy and is far too long than the cliched, "find a job you love and you'll never work a day in your life." I call BS on that one. Even when I like my job, it is hard work.

When I decided to take this job in Eugene I purposely set myself up for school again with a flexible, part-time schedule. Yep, AGAIN. I am intelligent and passionate and not ashamed at all these days of continuing to better myself. Many so-called vices could be much worse, so if you are the type to poke fun at someone who seems to always be in college-look away now. Education is a lifelong hobby and pursuit of mine. In April I will start my PMHNP certification program. Let's talk about letters a minute. With every degree or program or board certification you earn more alphabet soup after your name. I actually hate the title PMHNP because it is redundant. 

I currently am an FNP=Family Nurse Practitioner. I will add PMHNP and will be dual board-certified.

P: Psychiatric 

M: Mental 

H: Health 

N: Nurse

P: Practitioner

Do you see what I mean? I call it Psych NP. Maybe we should add 1-2 more letters to just ENSURE that everyone knows this is mental health. I guess PNP was already taken as that is Pediatric Nurse Practitioner. 😏😏😏 Anyway, 18 months from April 2022 (October 2023) I will be done. More schooling, 540 MORE clinical hours. I will complete additional training for mental health: psychotherapy and medication. I could have done this instead of FNP, but I chose to do it in addition for 2 reasons: 1) Patient protection. I want to know all about every body system and total health prior to focusing on mental health. This is not to say this is how all people should do this. Many mentors of mine did not go this route and are excellent. It is just the correct route for me. 2) My protection. I will be board certified in both family medicine and psychiatry which means for this gal who can get bored easily, I can do both. I can do many things. I can do one or the other. I can integrate. Side note: I don't care one little bit about earning more letters, I truly don't. I do care about mental health. 

If anything, my 2 short months as a PCP (primary care provider) have only fueled my passion for mental health more. Just this past week I saw a patient for pre-surgery clearance. We got to talking about mental health. 

"Doc," my patient says (and yeah, they know I am an NP, but MANY call me "doc" or just Sarah, and I answer to whatever they want to call me)..."I am struggling with my anxiety but I feel weird bringing that up. It really isn't related or important." Patient is heading toward the door. 

Me: "Now stop right there. If you injured your leg you would not hesitate to come see me, would you?" 

Patient: "well, no but..." 

Me: "Your mental health is just as important to me and should be to you as well. Please sit down, let's talk." 

I wish I could tell you that this interaction is rare, but some variation of it happens at least weekly. WEEKLY! It is 2021 and the stigma (while better) is still there to talk about mental health as if it is any different than me treating you for a foot infection or diabetes. It makes me angry. Incensed. Sad. I long to change this in many populations: adolescents where if we can get help on board will have more fulfilling/healthy futures, first responders who see and hear more than most of us could ever imagine and need someone to listen, transgender folks who have appalling suicide rates. My mission field in a way. One step at a time. 

Today, on my low-key holiday, I am thankful, so thankful. I am thankful for my best friend and partner who supports me in all my endeavors, my sons who may very well follow in my footsteps (though will be blessings at whatever they each choose), my parents, grandparents, family cheering me on from afar. I am thankful for friends and mentors new and old alike who have made a difference in my journey. I am thankful for my home, my health, my life, my passions. I am thankful for the worlds of characters in the books I read that live on in my heart, the quotes that stick with me like recently and in perfect timing, "choosing to not pursue the gift you have to help the world is selfish," (something like that, I summarize).

Happy Thanksgiving